This is a guest post from Daniel B. Hess and Bernice Hurtado of The Better Mind Center.
We live in a fast-paced world. We are often overscheduled and overstimulated. Humans were not designed to be constantly engaged to this degree, and the pressure created by this intensity opens possibilities for chronic stress, mood changes, and nervous system dysregulation.
We also live in a hyper-connected world with relentless social media access. It feels like everyone has an opinion on everything, all the time, and there are limitless opportunities for comparison. Even decisions about our self-care can be stressful! Are we eating the healthiest diet? Are we practicing the most effective meditation techniques? Is our exercise routine optimized for the fastest results? In this environment, we can begin questioning almost everything we do.
Oftentimes threats are processed by our brain in a way that makes mild threats seem worse than they are in reality. Perhaps you find yourself scrolling through your social media and land upon a video in which a nutritionist discusses the effects of artificial sugars and urges viewers to avoid all sweeteners. This may cause you to doubt your eating habits— and you impulsively decide to purge your pantry. We have a tendency to engage in this type of all-or-nothing behavior as a strategy for escaping uncertainty. In reality, most things are neither “all good” or “all bad.” With practice, it’s possible to get more comfortable with gray areas.
Strategies For Coping With Uncertainty
There’s no doubt about it: Uncertainty is stressful. Adopting these behaviors can help.
Modify your internal dialogue
Soothe your brain with messages of safety. Assure yourself that you will listen to your needs in the moment. Practice using breathwork to help you cope with experiences.
Recognize your feeling of uncertainty
Many people constantly search for undeniable proof that they are making the best decision in the moment. Still, can we lean into discomfort that we might experience and re-assess that the discomfort we feel is not dangerous but rather merely uncomfortable. Bring your awareness to your body. Practice grounding yourself in the moment by bringing awareness to your surrounding environment and acknowledging the present moment.
Acknowledge that many situations have risks, but consider the risks as minimal
Rely on your past experiences with risks as evidence to help you regulate your reaction to current risks. For example, many people had a fear of exposure to COVID-19 during the pandemic, in which they imagined that they would readily catch COVID-19 while they were outside of their homes. To help manage such fears and uncertainties, we recommend focusing on what you can do. During the pandemic, options included eating outside, wearing a mask, sanitizing and washing hands, and adopting behaviors that you can control. Every time you step outside, you expose yourself to the fear, and the more you can expose yourself to risks and function confidently, the more your fear subsides.
It is also important to develop skills in caring for ourselves during the in-between states. For example, can you truly permit yourself to enjoy an outing with friends rather than continuing to live in the ‘what if’ scenarios that reflect fear and uncertainty. We can regulate ourselves by listening to our bodies; can we keep an eye inward and remind ourselves that human connection, being outdoors, and having moments of joy is highly beneficial to regulating our mental state. It is helpful to refocus your attention on what you can do in the present moment rather than obsess about things out of your control or in the future.
Generate self-compassion in yourself
Sometimes people have more compassion for others than they have for themselves. Every time we experience uncertainty, we are faced with another opportunity to try out a different reaction and coping strategies, opening up possibilities for different outcomes of situations. If avoidance, fear, or anxiety takes over in any situation, it is possible to pause the activity and try again another time. There should be no rushed feeling and no pressure to “get everything right” the first time. Get more comfortable with feeling compassion toward yourself.
Practice Makes Progress
In most situations, it can be healthy and productive to recognize that there is risk and uncertainty. It is also productive to train yourself to get comfortable with that risk and uncertainty. By recognizing and acknowledging that certain external events can put your mind in a fearful state, you can build greater trust in yourself concerning your ability to handle challenging situations.